Understanding the Heartbreak and Horror of a Missing Child

The Pain of Loss and What It Feels Like

Fortunately, I have no experience with kidnapping. Losing my 31-year-old son by suicide has taught me that the depth of depression and heartbreak is unlike any other experience. While such an event typically involves the loss of a younger child, the scale of grief can be even more profound when it involves a younger individual, as you would wonder what life would hold for them. If your child is kidnapped, the horror is unimaginable, with each hour bringing new fears: are they alive? Are they being tortured? Will you ever see them again?

Statistically, the odds of a child being returned unharmed are slim, especially considering cases like that of Elizabeth Smart and the Cleveland kidnappings. While Elizabeth Smart endured such horrific treatment, fewer than a handful of those kidnapped ever survived. A few, like the Cleveland victims, emerged but many were tragically not as fortunate.

Personal Experiences with Kidnapping: A Narrow Escape

When my son was 16, he experienced an attempted kidnapping during high school. It was a terrifying moment. He was waiting outside a classroom for his husband to pick him up for a dentist appointment when a scruffy man in a van approached him and pretended to be looking for a lost dog. Before he knew it, he was being pulled into the van. In a moment that I can still feel, my son broke free and ran to the office to alert the staff and police. He even managed to note the license plate of the van as the kidnapper drove away. The man, undeterred, tried to kidnap another student but was caught shortly after by the police, who had the license plate number.

While the boys were spared from harm, the incident left all three of us shaken. We realized just how close we had come to a heartbroken outcome. This experience left a lasting impact, and even after 11 years, the idea of what might have been still gives me chills.

The Unknowable Future and Parental Horror

Today, when people ask me about the pain and inability to process the loss of our son, I pray that they will never have to experience such suffering. Parental horror and agony are inexpressible. The fear of the unknown is the most terrifying aspect of such an event. As a parent, the mere thought of their child being kidnapped can di?n be a nightmare. The hope and dreams of a child's future are shattered in a single moment, leaving a gaping wound that never fully heals.

Support for Parents Experiencing Kidnapping Loss

For parents who have experienced kidnapping or the loss of a child, support and guidance are crucial. Organizations like The National Center for Missing Exploited Children and local law enforcement can provide valuable resources and emotional support. Sharing stories and experiences with others who have gone through similar traumas can also provide comfort and understanding.