The Scariest Commercials of My Childhood: From Vampires to Honey Monsters
Growing up, I was exposed to a wide variety of tv commercials, some of which still stick with me to this day. Particularly from my childhood, two commercials stand out as particularly haunting. One is the British advert from the 1980s that featured a character dressed as a vampire, and the other was the iconic Honey Monster from Sugar Puffs cereal.
Panic in the Crypt: A British Vampire Commercial
In the 1980s, a British advert for Fresh cream cakes featured comedy actor Kenneth Williams dressed as a vampire lying in a coffin. The commercial began with a klaxon clarion that sounded like an alarm clock, which set the tone for the rest of the ad. Halfway through the commercial, our protagonist, played by Kenneth Williams, was shown slipping on bathwater and then striding directly into the path of a morris-trabant, ending up in a crumpled heap. This commercial not only scared the audience into the unknown, but also eerily predicted the coming world of technology and indoor gaming. This advertisement left a lasting impression on me, and it is easy to see why it would be unsettling for children to watch.
The Honey Monster: A Yetified Hunchback
One cereal that had a mascot that scared a lot of kids was Sugar Puffs, and its mascot, the Honey Monster, was a hulking yeti-esque creature that loved honey. The commercials featured kids trying to get to the cereal and screaming 'I want my... Honey!' Instead of 'mommy', they exclaim 'honey' in a deep, inhuman voice. The voice of the Honey Monster, known as Gary Martin, has also voiced other characters like Rockbiter and his son in the third Neverending Story. This commercial was not only creepy but also had a dark undertone. It is hard not to have nightmares about running into the Honey Monster or seeing the cereal aisle full of Sugar Puffs boxes everywhere.
The Design of the Honey Monster
The original design of the Honey Monster was a deformed mix of Sasquatch and Quasimodo with googly eyes. In the commercials, kids tried to get to the cereal, exclaiming 'I want my...' and growling 'HONEY!' in a voice that wasn't their own but that of the monster. The monster's voice was credited to UK voice actor Gary Martin. This menacing commercial had children in my generation scream 'honey' in a deep voice, making us all scream for our mothers. It is easy to see why this candy-coated mascot left such a lasting impression on me and my peers.
Conclusion
From the crypts of a dark and mysterious past to the aisles of childhood nightmares, these commercials were not just advertisements but also contributed to shaping our imaginations. These scariest commercials of my childhood were not only memorable but also deeply unsettling, leaving a lasting impact on those who grew up watching them.