The Absolute Worst Songs for a Jukebox: Navigating the Perfect Playlist
Introduction:
Creating a perfect jukebox playlist is an art form that requires a keen understanding of what music resonates with your audience. However, there are some songs that just don't belong in a jukebox. In this article, we'll explore some of the most frustrating tracks to include, potential reasons for their inclusion, and how to craft a jukebox playlist that truly satisfies bar patrons and concert goers alike.
What Constitutes an Absolute Worst Song for a Jukebox?
When considering the types of songs that should be avoided in a jukebox, one factor that stands out is the length of the track. Long songs can quickly become tedious, detracting from the overall experience. Additionally, songs that are niche, irritating, or contain offensive lyrics tend to drive away patrons. Here, we'll delve into several examples to provide a clearer picture.
Nickelback: The Eternal Culprit
Anyone who has ever had the misfortune of hearing a Nickelback song in a public setting knows how quickly they can become exasperating. Known for their formulaic and uninspired rock music, Nickelback songs would undoubtedly frustrate anyone forced to listen to them. The repetitive nature and lack of innovation often leave listeners feeling let down. Hence, Nickelback is a clear contender for the absolute worst songs to put on a jukebox.
Foreigner's "I Wanna Know What Love Is": A Universal Annoyance
The song "I Wanna Know What Love Is" by Foreigner is a prime example of a tune that can be intolerable, especially if played at maximum volume. As one cocktail waitress working at a young, 20s hangout bar discovered, constant repetition of this song would be unbearable for patrons. To combat this, she would continuously play "Put Another Log on the Fire" by Tompall Glaser, which is unpopular among both women and country music enthusiasts. This tactic successfully deterred the repeated playing of the immersion-sapping Foreigner track. Both patron reaction and rebel spirit should be taken into consideration when curating a jukebox playlist.
Unintended Hits: "Chick-a-Boom, Don't Ya Jes Love It?"
Once upon a time in the 1970s, "Chick-a-Boom, Don't Ya Jes Love It?" made it to #9 on the Billboard Pop Chart. While its popularity remains puzzling, the song's lyrics and melody are universally unappealing. The exclamation "chick-a-boom" in a song about love sounds more suited to a cartoon than a serious duet. Making such a track available on a jukebox could guarantee a stifling silence from patrons who prefer something more uplifting or engaging.
Unisex and Inclusive Music
Lastly, it's important to consider the unisex and politically correct nature of songs. Excessive offending or exclusive language should be avoided at all costs. Jukebox playlists should cater to a diverse audience, ensuring inclusivity and respect for all patrons.
Golden Era Hits: A Necessary Component of a Juicy Jukebox Playlist
While modern songs hold their own charm and appeal, it's crucial to recognize the significance of songs from the golden era. Think of classic artists like Elvis, Chuck Berry, The Rolling Stones, The Beatles, Motown, The Byrds, and The Beach Boys. These iconic artists have left an indelible mark on music history and their tracks continue to resonate with audiences. The '90s and beyond are best left for those nostalgic for newer sounds, providing a timeless selection that includes hits from these legendary performers.
By carefully selecting songs that are inclusive, unoffensive, and engaging, you can create a jukebox playlist that not only entertains but also leaves your patrons wanting more. Remember, the right playlist can enhance your patrons' experience and leave a lasting impression.