Ownership of Your Goals: What Do You Truly Desire?

Have you ever found yourself sitting down with a list of goals, only to question whose goals they truly are? This battle of internal versus external desires can significantly impact your motivation and success in achieving your objectives. In this article, we will delve into the importance of identifying and owning your goals, backed by the reflection of Jane's journey and a personal quest to clarify personal aspirations.

Understanding the Origin of Your Goals

As Jane emphasizes in her podcast “THE ABCS OF LIFE WITH JANE”, understanding the source of your goals is crucial for personal growth and success. Questioning the origins of your goals is the first step towards clarifying your true desires. Are the goals your own or influenced by external factors such as family, societal expectations, or cultural norms?

Personal Reflection and Goal Clarification

Take a moment to engage in some profound self-reflection. Consider the following questions to uncover the true nature of your goals:

How would you like your life to look? Who are you as an individual? What values do you hold dear? Why are you here? What do you want people to remember about you when you are gone? When do you want to own a house? When do you want to start a family? How can you make a positive impact on the world? Are you honoring your parents' wishes? What skills do you possess? What frustrates you when you see it in the world?

Ownership and Realization of Goals

After answering these questions, it becomes clear whether the goals you hold are truly your own or influenced by others. Remember, if your parents are willing to support you in their desired direction, you might find it easier to follow their path initially. However, you can still work towards your own goals within their parameters.

Here is a personal example from Jane:

Be the valedictorian: A secret goal for personal achievement without external pressure. Graduate high school: A goal for both Jane and her family. Get into Johns Hopkins University: Jane’s own ambition. Become a gender confirmation surgeon: Jane’s unique aspiration, despite external motives for financial gain. Get married: A personal goal, independent of her parents' desires. Have a family: Jane’s distinct goal, stood on her own while navigating her parents’ conflicting views. Build a cabin in the forests of Washington State: A highly personalized aspiration with specific needs. Be happy with the accomplishments in life: A goal shared with Jane's loved ones, but fundamentally Jane's own.

Conclusion: Embracing True Desires

Ultimately, it is essential to own your goals and ensure they align with your values and aspirations. This process of self-discovery and goal clarification can help you stay motivated and focused on what truly matters to you. Regardless of the external pressures, staying true to your own desires can lead to a more fulfilling and successful life.