Narcissists in Love: A Deeper Examination

Narcissists in Love: A Deeper Examination

The idea of a narcissist falling in love with another narcissist can seem like a paradox to most. However, within the complex world of narcissistic relationships, there are patterns and dynamics that help us understand why this phenomenon occurs and what it entails.

The Tragic Cycle of Infatuation and Devaluation

When a narcissist falls for another narcissist, the initial phase of intense infatuation can be misleading. Both partners are drawn to each other ostensibly because of their shared sense of grandiosity, superiority, and a need for admiration. This infatuation is brief, however, as reality soon sets in. One or both individuals inevitably fail to uphold the idealized image of the perfect partner. Vulnerabilities in one person or an unwanted behavior from the other can shift the dynamics drastically. The narcissist reacts by devaluing the other, kicking off a drawn-out descent into a toxic relationship.

When Two Narcissists Collide

Two narcissists entering a relationship can create a volatile situation. In this dynamic, one partner often ends up pursuing the other more intensively. As the relationship deteriorates, it's the pursuer who becomes unhinged, leading to a significant loss of their composure. Ultimately, both are unable to love due to the inherent emotional void and the lack of empathy that characterizes narcissistic personality disorder (NPD).

Attraction and Enmity Among Narcissists

Narcissists are attracted to one another because of their mutual admiration and use of each other for validation and self-aggrandizement. However, when the relationship inevitably crumbles, both are prone to posting about each other's narcissistic traits. This cycle of attraction, devaluation, and mutual destruction is a hallmark of their relationships, driven by the sadistic thrill of psychological warfare.

Psychological Battle and Observation

Their interactions can be akin to a psychological battle, where neither can win a neutral draw. Unlike the Predators vs. Aliens movie, where both characters end up either dead or severely injured, there is no resolution in a narcissistic relationship. Both individuals end up in psychological turmoil, often leading to mutual destruction. Observing such a dynamic from the outside can be a fascinating but also disturbing experience, akin to watching a thrilling yet harrowing movie.

Alternatives to Psychological Warfare

Since narcissists are fundamentally incapable of reciprocal love and bonding, the notion of a romantic relationship between two of them is fraught with hardship. The pursuit of self-interest and the disregard for others' feelings mean that both parties are likely to suffer. Yet, there is hope that through such intense conflicts, both individuals might gain insight into the dynamics of their own actions and behaviors. Perhaps, in the end, they will learn valuable lessons from their experiences.

Conclusion

Narcissists in love are a complex phenomenon, often seen in the backdrop of psychological warfare and mutual destruction. While these relationships are not typical of healthy love, they offer a unique glimpse into the intricate human psyche. Understanding the dynamics of such relationships can help us navigate the sometimes treacherous terrain of human behavior and interpersonal relationships.

Keywords

Narcissists Love relationships Psychological dynamics

References

Rice, E., Tracy, J. L., Bush; R. C. (2006). Empathy in narcissistic personality disorder. Journal of Personality Disorders, 20(4), 387-408. D wonderful book on Narcissism, and provides a detailed analysis of narcissistic personality disorder and its impact on relationships.