Do Narcissists Buy People?

When we think of narcissists and their tactics, money often comes to mind as a common strategy they use to gain the upper hand. However, the truth is more complex and concerning than that.

Manipulation Through Purchases

Narcissists do buy people, but not always directly through monetary transactions. Instead, they use their skills and techniques to manipulate and control situations to their advantage. Sometimes, they may offer to buy things to gain interest or favor from their targets, especially if they see an opportunity to use the transaction as a tool for further manipulation.

Artistic Relationships and Narcissistic Tactics

In my experience, narcissists have shown particular interest in art works and have bought some of them. This was a form of gaining importance and sponsors in the artist's life. Many narcissists in such relationships often maintain a strategic distance to preserve their control and power. This strategy not only serves to gain leverage but also to maintain a level of mystery and allure.

The Core of Narcissism

The core of narcissism lies in the love for power and domination, rather than for love itself. To understand this, you need to truly grasp that simple yet profound statement: Narcissists buy you from day one.

Lovebombing and Devaluation

When a narcissist starts a relationship, it often begins with what is known as a 'lovebombing' phase. This can include the lavish spending of time and resources. However, this is not genuine love but a form of manipulation. For instance, a narcissist might go on a shopping spree, all the while holding up the things they've purchased as signs of their wealth and affection, while the target is still oblivious to their hidden motive.

After establishing a degree of control, the narcissist starts to devalue the target by stripping them of any qualities that once made them attractive. This process involves mirroring affection when it suits them and then suddenly turning on the target with harsh criticism. The goal is to devalue the target and boost the narcissist's own status by comparison, thus entrenching their superiority and control.

This cycle of buying, devaluation, and redirection is a core tactic of narcissism. Once the initial targets are devalued, the narcissist moves on to find new objects of desire, thereby preserving their upper hand.

Power and Control Over People

The underlying principle behind narcissist behavior is the need to control and hurt others without risking their own well-being. Narcissists see people not so much as individuals, but as objects with status. They rank these objects by high and low status and plan their actions based on what they can obtain from them.

If a narcissist encounters someone with something they desire, they will plan a strategy to gain that thing, simultaneously devaluing the potential target. This process often involves mirroring love and then controlling it, much like playing a game of cat and mouse. Once the desired qualities are stripped away, the target is devalued and viewed with contempt, which benefits the narcissist by boosting their own status.

The cycle of attraction and devaluation continues indefinitely, as narcissists move on to new targets in the pursuit of power and control. This is why understanding the core nature of narcissism is crucial for recognizing and protecting oneself from such manipulative behaviors.

In conclusion, narcissists do not merely buy people, but they use these relationships as tools for power and control. Recognizing and understanding these strategies can help individuals avoid falling victim to such manipulation.