Dealing with a Narcissist Who Ghosted You: Moving On and Healing
When someone who is a narcissist ghosts you, it can be a challenging experience. However, instead of trying to get revenge, it's often more beneficial to focus on healing and moving forward with your own life. In this article, we will explore why getting revenge isn't necessary and provide strategies for dealing with the situation.
Why Not Trying to Get Revenge is the Best Thing to Do
Revenge is not the answer when a narcissist ghosts you. By choosing to ghost them back, you are essentially cutting off all communication and turning the tables on them. This can be liberating and can help you regain control and peace in your life.
One of the best lessons we can learn from being ghosted is to appreciate the blessing of not having to deal with someone who is potentially harmful and manipulative. The narcissist's sudden disappearance means that they likely do not value you as much as you value them. It's important to shift your focus towards healing and moving forward, rather than dwelling on seeking revenge.
Strategies for Moving On
When dealing with a narcissist who has ghosted you, it's crucial to prioritize your mental and emotional well-being. Here are a few strategies that can help you move on:
Avoid Trying to Contact the Narcissist
Maintain a state of indifference towards the narcissist’s actions. Try not to reach out or contact them. Any attempt to do so might be perceived as you 'chasing' them, which could play into their manipulative tactics. Instead, focus on your own life and relationships.
Do Not Respond to Hoovering Attempts
Narcissists often attempt to 'Hoover' you back into their lives after a period of ghosting. This involves attempting to manipulate you into contacting them or contacting you. If you encounter such attempts, do not respond. Maintain your distance and avoid giving in to their tactics.
Be Polite but Indifferent in Public Encounters
If you encounter the narcissist in public, such as outside your home or in a social setting, be polite but indifferent. Do not acknowledge their absence or make a big deal out of their return. By remaining indifferent, you are not giving them the satisfaction of knowing how much you care.
Understanding the Manipulative Nature of Narcissists
It's essential to understand that the narcissist's behavior is manipulative and part of their pattern. They may try to manipulate you into believing you were the one who wronged them by apologizing or playing the victim. However, it's important to stay strong and avoid falling into their trap.
Often, the narcissist will return because they find themselves alone or because they meet someone else. They may also return because of personal insecurities or a need for validation. Regardless of their reasons, the return is often a strategy to control and manipulate you. Recognize that their behavior is not about your value, but about their own need for control.
Acknowledging the Pain but Moving Forward
It's natural to feel pain and confusion when someone you care about ghosts you. You might find yourself wondering what you did wrong, but it's important to recognize that the narcissist's actions are not reflective of your worth. Focus on healing and coping with the emotional pain. Seek support from friends, family, or a professional therapist if needed.
Ultimately, the best course of action when dealing with a narcissist who has ghosted you is to focus on your own well-being and healing. By letting go of the desire for revenge and moving forward, you can reclaim your life and learn to trust and love again, appreciating the blessings that come with leaving toxic relationships behind.