Changes in a Narcissist: A Journey Through Their Appearance
Meandering through old photos of an ex-partner, it's intriguing to observe how their physical appearance, particularly their facial expressions, have altered over time. Notably, they have gone through several transformations that are strikingly evident to those close to them.
The Enigmatic Transformation
The recent photos of my ex-partner are startlingly different from when we first met. They have undergone a series of changes, including a drastic alteration in hair color. He initially appeared to be trying to project the image of a Nordic type, possibly due to my German heritage and Nordic ancestry. My mother and even my friend noticed that his hair negatively and it looked the same as the boxed hair dye his mother used. There were also dark spots that looked particularly unnatural.
Recalling that I had just finished a fantasy novel featuring a blonde knight and knowing that he had read it, it's plausible that he was attempting to embody the character to please me. However, a few years later, during a period when he was dating a Puerto Rican woman, his hair was no longer bright blonde, appearing instead a dark brown. This transformation caught my friend's attention, further confirming suspicions that he was altering his appearance.
Unveiling the Physical Alteration
Not only has he changed his hair color multiple times, but there also seems to be a significant physical change in his appearance that is alarming. It appears that he has aged tremendously in just a few years. The transformation is so drastic that he looks like an aging hobo, possibly around ten years older than his actual age. These changes led to some chuckles from my friends, but I'm genuinely concerned about his wellbeing and conscious behavior.
Reflections on a Narcissist's Transformation
A recent shared experience with another individual who has been subjected to a narcissist's affection also illustrates the profound changes these individuals can undergo. In my case, I stepped away from this relationship and do not wish to see her again, discarding her influence in my life. Conversely, she has also gone through noticeable changes, one of which is letting herself go, possibly as a result of her advancing age.
It is ironic that her new partner has already let go of his appearance a long time ago, exacerbating her situation. This could be a mix of her advancing age, her neglect of personal care (often spending hundreds on hair and nails), and her desperate efforts to chase away family members by threatening to remove them from her will if they place her in a care home. She seems lost, extremely desperate, and in need of assistance.
In her situation, she never seemed interested in mimicking or resembling me, who maintained my looks and did not appear my age. Instead, she had expressed jealousy at my appearance and the way I cared for myself. This further highlights the manipulative and self-centered nature of such relationships.
Observing these changes, it becomes clear that narcissists often experience significant physical and emotional transformations, especially when they are dealing with 'supply' or new relationships. These changes are often abrupt, driven by their own insecurities and the desire to appeal to others.